THEY HAVEN’T EVEN begun, and Rio’s Olympic games already look like a hot mess. Starting with the ban of Russian athletes because of doping to the poop water everywhere. Yeah, poop water! Are these athletes supposed to swim in that? Guess so. Along with that, every athlete is going to begiven 42 condoms. That is so much sex. Might as well call it “Sex-lympics.”
Given all this drama, how could you possibly miss out? The games start on Wednesday, August 3. The opening ceremonies are actually two days later, on Friday the 5th. (Weird, right?) The games end with a closing ceremony on Sunday, August 21.
Catch It On Your Television
The primary television network that will broadcast the games is NBC. In a span of two weeks, you will witness enough sappy, heartfelt athlete stories to make you cry. Also: so much sports! And reports about countries you’ve never heard of (like Eritrea, which I’m not even sure how to pronounce properly).
Consult the full schedule of every Olympic event so you can know when the medal rounds occur for your favorite sports.
Other channels within the NBC corporate empire will also air some events, because obviously one network can’t handle everything. Look for some events on Bravo, MSNBC, and USA Network. It’s on these other networks where you can find equestrian, which is horses jumping over stuff at a really fast pace. Who wouldn’t want to watch that? There’s a schedule of major events across these networks at NBC Sports.
Although NBC will be the primary network to air the big-ticket events, you can catch some men’s and women’s soccer games in Spanish on Telemundo and NBC Universo. This is where you can catch a commentator almost lose their breath screaming goooooooooool for a comically unnecessary amount of time.
Tennis is never boring. You can watch Serena Williams defend her gold medal for like the millionth time. And you can watch all of it on Bravo. No need for the back-and-forth between channels, just stay in one spot.
Maybe you just want to lay on the couch to watch the games. Well, you can now. You’ll need to download the NBC Sports app to your Apple TV, Roku, Android TV, or Xbox. There’s are NBC Sports mobile apps for both Android and iOS as well, and even one for Windows Phone.
The apps offers a variety of live and on-demand options. However, a cable network provider login is required. (Ask to borrow your parents’ login—they have cable, right?)
If that’s not an option, you can actually just stream Olympics straight from the NBC website, no login required. The network will be streaming the games live with regular commercial breaks. The only catch is that you have to watch it in a browser. Events will be streamed live and delayed, but if you miss that stressful handball game between Russia and Canada, check back at 3am—NBC will play reruns after hours.
VR for the Fainthearted
For the first time ever, viewers will be able to get a virtual reality view of the games. People can finally believe they’re an Olympic athlete and brag to their friends that they won a medal in Brazil. (Which is something I would totally do). Select events will be available in VR the day after they air live. Sure, you’ll probably already know who won, but it should be an interesting way to watch the games.
You will not be able to escape Olympic fever for about two weeks in August, so why not join in on the fun? Grab a cold one, sit down on your couch, maybe even strap on a VR headset, and cheer on your home country.